Wheel of Dead Woman

   One of the truly revolutionary aspects of the New Las Vegas will be new and exciting games of chance. One of the many fascinating ones is the Dead Woman Wheel. There really isn't a wheel, it is just called that to give the whole thing a roullette-like flavor to the ear. The New Las Vegas will be warrened with off-side corridors and enclosed pathways that you can enter and travel for paying a nominal gambling wager. The door opens and if you are lucky along your solitary path you will encounter a scantily clad "dead" female. She will not really be dead of course because then she would be completely unsuitable for sex. For most people. This "newly and freshly dead" person will of course have to be violated in a manner most in keeping with your own perverted and twisted imaginings. My own favorite, if you are interested, is to drag my erect cock back and forth across the unmoving allegedly dead but actually quite warm and cushioney lips of the deceased and of course to manually pull aside the small piece of whatever it is that is covering the twat of said victim and stare at it. There is a strict time limit of fifteen minutes after which the "victim" slowly "comes to" and you are faced with the embarrassing likelihood of her commenting at the tiny size of your dick which she probably peeked at. On the plus side, if you start licking her pussy and she likes it, she wont wait for the fifteen minutes to wake up. She will wake up right away and take you off somewhere and screw the game. This is how these woman are in this arena, my friend, get used to it.

Flash Street Performers

   As you stroll the sidewalks of the New Las Vegas you won't be pestered by herds of three foot tall peruvian males snapping erotic business cards of pics of women with stars over their nipples on one side and phone numbers on the other advising you to call those numbers to have illegal prostitues come to your room because there won't be any illegal prostitutes in the New Las Vegas, all the prostitutes will be legal. However you will be subjected to sudden dramatizations of various violations of other peoples' bodies, in this case cheerleader-clad high school pretenders engaging in a group violation of each others' vaginas, some even by their own hand! The human pussy, of course, is the center of the universe, as any normal man will attest and women are aware of this also. These scenarios presented for your view as you walk your way from here to there certainly, I think you will agree, are a lot more entertaining than watching jugglers at Venice Beach or robot dancers on Santa Monica Pier. Plus, unlike the last two groups mentioned, with these you can take out your dick and masturbate your ejaculant onto them. For a fee. They will pass the hat to you, and most-determinedly, if you jizz on them. And being a piker about it is not something the local enforcers approve of either. Behave. And be fair. No one really wants your jizz on them, no matter how much you might think they do.

The Hall of Boners

      The Hall of Boners is a ubiquitous venue that is more or less randomly placed throughout the New Las Vegas for when that moment hits when a woman just needs to be systematically but humanely ravaged by a line of naked male brutes who watch their calories, exercise regularly, and remove all their body hairs. The restraints shown not only elevate the twattal entrance to a level comfortable for all participants, they also provide that essential calming of conscience should the ravaged gal at some point wonder "Is this right?" Stop beating yourself up with that question, Ma'am, you had no choice, you could not prevent it, your wrists were manacled. You were a victim. Stop blaming yourself. And clean your pussy, it's full of jizz.

The Daughters of Sappho Hotel and Casino

 

   The Daughters of Sappho Hotel and Casino will be nothing like the Amazon or the dominatrix venues in the New Las Vegas, where violence and humiliation accompany your sojourn within a naked lady environment, no, here there is only gentleness and warmth. Above are two of the dual housekeeping maids pausing in their mundane chores of yanking your cum-stained bedsheets away and sanitizing your toilet. And they will likely not have to go to the bother of leaving an envelope on the table begging for a tip, you will likely not be able to pay them enough spontaneously if they happen to be expressing their eternal love for each other in your presence, which they of course will prefer to do.

The Disney-Lucas Zone cont.

   Since the New Las Vegas will not be admitting people under legal age, and since adults won't be having any children in tow, Disney and Lucas Corp will not be too concerned about maintaining their image as toy makers unless they decide to enter the dildo market. The only teens in sight will be make believe ones, or at least legal ones, and if they decide to pretend to be younger, well, that does manage to keep the "youthful forever" theme in tact that Disney tries so hard to convey and impart. And what is it young girls hitting puberty do?….they play with each others vaginas. Above is one of the nightly performances of the puberty version of Toot, Whistle, Plunk and Boom. It's called Lick, Rub, Slide and Scissors. It's a total fucking hit.

The Disney-Lucas Combine Cont.

   The good thing about Twileks is they don't wear a lot of clothes. Siths are generally confident and so clothing is optional when you are 100% sure you are never going to get raped or taken advantage of. While not all Twileks are Siths those two draping appendages hanging from the tops of their skulls are filled with all manner of, while not Force-sensitive atoms, molecules complex and abundant enough to be the next best thing. While they may not be able to make things move without touching them, reading your thoughts to them is like reading candy labels to you. One thing all Twileks do share however is an enthusiasm for coitus. And they don't much care who supplies the other half of the tag team. So if you see somthing lounging about in the manner depicted above, when you ask it if it wants to fuck you might want to already have your dick out. Save a little time.

The Disney-Lucas Hotel and Casino and Spaceport

   It might be remembered that the Walt Disney Company recently bought the George Lucas company, at least that part of it that is Star Wars Enterprises. Disney also once bought Werner Von Braun, I don't know if anyone remembers that. The US Department of Defense thought they were the ones that bought him but they were only renting him as it turned out. It was Disney that owned him. Not that Werner cared, he much preferred Disney. He had worked with Hitler, remember, and as such - Hitler being the most brilliant bureaucrat in human history - for Von Braun to toy with the American State Department was like an SS toying with a dead jew in an oven with a poker; lots of fun and very easy to do.
   Unlike some of the other hotels the Disney-Lucas hotel will not be going out of its way to scare the living crap out of you or be doing much to cause you to question your sanity and your previous ideas concerning the nature of reality. It's not going to be Prude City, of course, that sort of thing would be completely forbidden in the New Las Vegas, however the accoutrements of the place are going to have a down to earth air about them even though a lot of the attention will be placed on things beyond the earth. Ironic, no? Yes, it is. But a little irony never hurt anybody.
   Pictured is one of the many helpful staffers who, since she has a lot of her body covered may or may not want you touching it. Staffers in the Disney-Lucas quadrant of the New Las Vegas can be borderline testy, and the ones with the cowls, and in this case a somewhat stylized cowl, may or may not know how to break all of your bones simultaneously which you may not even realize has happened until you collapse. And then of course die. Usually from the pain. Which is beyond even my ability to describe.

The Monorail in Hell

   The Hell Hotel monorail travels beneath the surface, not above it. The view given here is of the escalator that takes you to the subterranean caverns beneath the Hell. An all-axis 360 degree view of where you are is available but no one who was not involved in the building of the monorail or the photographing of the all-axis 360 degree view of its environs is allowed to see it. The reason for this is "a secret." That is the official response from any Hell employee when asked. "It's a secret." What isn't a secret is that you will be encouraged to ride the escalator down to the monorail level yourself and see first hand whatever might be on either side of the automated staircase. The buzz is that the monorail actually takes you to hell. The real one. The one where eternity awaits you and greets with a smile for your eyes and fish hooks for your flesh. That's the buzz. Everyone's first reaction is to not believe it. First reactions are often not final ones; as time goes by during your stay at the Hell the pestering curiosity regarding the subterranean monorail become increasingly irksome and sooner or later one begins contemplating very deliberately the idea of actually descending the metal staircase. Or being descended by it, being more accurately the way to put it. There are no actual reports from people who have gone down there what they saw there. And it seems likely that people have gone down there because humans are curious to explore things and places declared off limits to them. But there are no reports. Maybe in reality no one actually went down there. That would be one explanation.

The Zombie Hotel and Casino

   Zombies, God bless 'em, are as fixed into the culture of this planet lately as are Mexicans packed like sardines in American emergency rooms. The Zombie Hotel and Casino, while existing, is not going to be what you would call a hotbed of activity, one reason being zombies move very slowly. And since all the staffers will be arrayed as one of these, they will likely move as one of these. One of the virtues of the Zombie Hotel is that you learn how to handle your own shit, such as checking-in, checking-out, cleaning your room, preparing your own food in the restaurants, bring it to your own table, and tipping yourself. By the time you leave the Zombie, even if you only stay there one day, which is the norm, for some reason, by the time you leave you will be a whiz at hotel management since you will be doing a lot of it.

The Bathrooms of Hell

   The bathrooms of the Hell Hotel and Casino are appropriate to the parent enclosure. The bathrooms at the Madonna Inn in San Luis Obispo are famous for having a unique architecture however they pale in comparison and also in spectral horror to the bathrooms at the Hell. In fact the bathrooms at the Madonna Inn have no horrific aspects at all, if you want to know the truth. It would not have occurred to anyone involved in creating them to make them horrible.
   This was not the case with the Hell bathroom designers.
   The long walkway approaching the place where the "toilets" are is, as you can see, unencumbered by guardrails. So it is possible, if you are the kind of person inclined to do so, to save yourself a long walk and merely piss over the side. You will do this under the likely assumption that the gargoyles lining the approach to the "toilets" are sculptures. You will also do this under the assumption that even if they were not sculptures they certainly would not live in the foul and murky liquids far below. You will in fact hold on to these assumptions all the way to the point where you discover that you are now surrounded by staring, angry creatures who are very annoyed with you for having sent your steaming and foetid urine down onto their home. Whether you will survive your non-trip to the bathroom is something only the gargoyles will determine. And you will not have a role to play in the decision-making process. If it was up to me I would push you over the side if you had been pissing onto my house. But I have an attitude problem. Maybe gargoyles don't.

H.R. Giger Hotel and Casino Ubiquitous Design Motif

   Pictured is the, basically, logo of the HR Giger Hotel and Casino. It will be featured in all the ads for the place in town and on all the uniforms of the personnel and on the napkins in the bars and restaurants and carpeting and on the bottom of the pool. Get used to seeing it. It's message is clear and unambiguous: blowjob. It doesn't mean that if you stay there that you will get one but if you do get one you probably won't get into trouble for it, at least not from any of the staff or management of the place. If you are one of the many people who are particularly enamored of of the dark, biomechanical outre aspects of the HR Giger oeuvre, biomechanical spectral "females" will be available for "the real thing" just in case a normal human blowjob is not quite your thing. The only problem is getting them to release your cock after you cum. Maybe they will. Maybe they won't. If you are a true HR Giger fanatic this aspect should appeal to you. And you all know who you are.

Stubborn Little Brat Services

   "Stubborn little brat" services are available to the guest in the New Las Vegas but they are dispensed randomly and for free via a centralized version of a "drawing" in which the occupied hotel rooms of the city are represented in each drawing. The winning room gets to find, when he returns to it, a naked smoking hot teen ager sitting naked on the floor and refusing to move unless she gets her pussy licked. If for some insane reason the guest does not want to lick the stubborn brat's pussy he has to be prepared for his identity and likeness to be displayed on one or more of the many illuminated animated billboards of the town revealing that person to be a refuser of the stubborn brat's orders. This can have a favorable effect on him if his wife or girlfriend sees it. And that is about the only favorable effect and that one probably isn't even worth much in the long run.

Room Service

This is room service in the New Las Vegas: a prostitute. If you want she can bring food. The present Las Vegas has a law against prostitution. The "thinking" is it takes attention away from the gambling tables. This is not actual thinking however under any definition of the word. Actual thinking would be if you were going to have any kind of prostitution law it would be that the prostitute is required to spend some of her time with you at the gambling tables. And really, is a million dollar skim from prostitutes somehow less money than a million dollar skim from the slot machines? Let me walk you through this my Mafioso Thinking-Dudes: no. Getting back to Yolanda, here, she has had a tough day standing by your side at the crap table and now her foot hurts. Could you maybe massage it, Senyore? Por favor? And also por some cash my fren'? I can hear you saying yes from here.

When Things Go Wrong - The Complaint Dept.

   In the course of any customer-provider business arrangement or barter or understanding involving goods and services something is bound to go not-as-assumed sooner or later. The New Las Vegas is dedicated and devoted to Good Customer Service and Satisfaction Guaranteed. If you have a complaint regarding anything in the New Las Vegas you are shunted free of charge to a central complaint location. This service is provided free and is by Dedicated Train that sears into the desert east of the city. There you disembark into a futuristic array of buildings and fountains and delights to the eye. You are escorted into a private setting not unlike a dinner table at a plush restaurant or a meeting room suitable for high-level transactions among moguls of industry. You decide! A dedicated judge, a person born to the job of ascertaining injustices and quite comfortable and adept in the world of rights and wrongs will listen to your tale. This person will then adjudicate a settlement. More often than not the settlement will be someone similar to the image above. "We are terribly sorry that this happened during your stay in the New Las Vegas. Of course we do not know what sort of arrangement you are thinking of that will make this Right: however we are prepared to offer a one-time solution: Cynthia over there, who you see posing nonchalantly there in the red, carpeted booth. She will be happy to spend up to 8 hours with you doing all she can to make the remainder of your stay here happy. If you decide this will simply not do then you of course must tell us now, this minute, and we will close this deal and begin on some substitute arrangement in an effort to please you. You have 60 seconds to say yes or no to our first proposal." Nine times out of ten this initial offer is jumped at. Sometimes even if the complainant is a woman.

Hijinx At The Check-In counter

   There is nothing worse than waiting at the check-in counter to get a room for your magnificent vacation in the New Las Vegas…with nothing to do.
   There will still be nothing to do in the check-in lines at the New Las Vegas but you won't care because there will be other people doing plenty of things that you can watch. Hot lesbians making each other come via manual and oral explorations of each other's twats and tits while draped across sections of the long check-in venues…you will find yourself actually getting pissed off when the topless cutie down the way raises her hand and waggles it while calling out to you "Next, please!" Because it means you are going to have to take your eyes off the action and move along. Don't worry, you'll get over it. Really really fast, at this place.

Meet Your Driver

   Meet your driver. Transportation to and from the major environs of Las Vegas will be provided free of charge with donations being accepted by those travelers who appreciate the lack of clothing and the lack of islamic belief systems among the driving personnel. Yes, that's right, the drivers will be wearing things akin to the Lingerie Leagues' "uniforms" and none of the drivers - not even of the taxis - will be Muslims. And if they are Muslims they will have to do a pretty good job of disguising it. Yes, the New Las Vegas will totally have its shit together regarding the disciples of Allah. Because, you see, Muslims are not good for anything and so therefore there will be no need for them in the New Las Vegas as employees. Because employment and Islam are at odds with each other and any employment a Muslim does procure for himself is just to occupy his time until he is ordered to start killing people who are not Muslims. And let's face it, they kill other Muslims as well, so let's leave them with with their own ilk and kin to kill. And I don't think any rational person would have a problem with that since the only good Muslim is one accused of apostasy.

New Las Vegas Casino Security

   The guards patrolling the casinos and environs of the hotels and shopping areas will not be fat Mexican 3rd generation illegal high school dropout 19 year old oafs rousting more normal customers than troublemakers because it's safer and easier. No. There will be no people like that. In fact there will be no male guards at all. There will be scantily clad hot babes with swords and or spears who will sever your limbs or impale you like barbecue if you cause any fucking trouble. They will also completely disrobe before they attack, causing you precious seconds of preparedness should you have been so foolish as to decide resistance was not futile. Seeing their pussy flash into view will give the guards all the advantages and give you none. Why not just behave? They'll be happy to show you their pussy without killing you if you just ask nice and hand them a 20.

Poolside At The Hell Hotel

   Poolside activities at the Hell Hotel, as depicted in the bottom picture, are different from what constitutes normal poolside activity on a good day in the traditional Las Vegas Strip environment as depicted in the top picture. An array of hotties poolside at the Hell very often quickly turns into a cannibalistic bloodbath. Demons would rather eat organs than eat pussy. This traditional portrayal that you hear about of succubi and incubi wanting to fornicate is pretty much soft-pedaling what succubi and incubi are actually interested in doing to you: and that would be devouring you raw if possible and pulling you apart limb from limb if eating you like candy is out of the question. Of course you are supposed to think these manifestations poolside at the Hell Hotel are all prearranged skits and plays for your entertainment. And who is to say they are not.

The Throne of Satan

   The Hell Hotel has as one of its unadvertised features the actual throne of Satan. He is not in it much, he is always on the go, it seems. Most of the guests never even get to see it, you have to be willing to wander and explore the property to an extent a lot of the guests find unwarranted, for one reason or another, most of them having to do with peace of mind. The Hell Hotel is not scary, exactly, so much as it is relentless. It has a resonating almost delightful - if you are that kind of person - sort of exuberant futility. It is like DOOM but with better rendering pixels. Also, unlike DOOM, things do not appear from around corners and shoot you to death. Those who grew up with DOOM will recall that DOOM is not so much depressing as it is persistent in its own determination to put you somewhere where you don't belong whereas the things that do belong there are quite content to be there. Maybe not happy to be there, but who can discern the anatomy of emotions of folks and non-folks born and raised in hell. To them it's home. To you?.....well, what can I say, it's Hell.

Your Helpful Consierges At The Hell Hotel

   Your questions during your stay at the Hell Hotel can be directed to the two excellent employees of the Hell Hotel who work at the consierge station, Noface and Zargnarog. But really, is what you need to know so fucking important that you need to approach either one of these two to get your answer? Noface is especially hard to understand even over and above his natural reluctance to communicate by amy means other than a pickax into the back. Sprays of what one would assume is spittal fly from his...from the area immediately above his tie...and can be quite distracting to the listener trying to nail down the details of when tickets for the next "O" performance go on sale and where. Or whatever it is the Cirque du Soleil will be doing in the New Las Vegas over and above their in-your-face sex acts in the lobbies and restaurants of the town.
   Zargnarog is more talkative but even then it's not long sentences. "I want you dead" is his most common response when asked a question by a paying guest.
   You might be asking by now "Why would anyone at all go to the Hell Hotel under any circumstances other than duress?"
   You would have to ask the customers of the place. I dont have that answer. Noface and Zagnargog might have the answer, you could ask them. Bring a towel if you ask Noface.

The Hell Hotel

   The Hell Hotel and Casino is a step removed even from the most unique of the new hotels and casino themes which will abound in the New Las Vegas. It is almost a good idea not to even go in there sober. Being falling down drunk will be a better way to go. You will not be arrested or harmed by the staff, they will feel some relief that here at least is one guest who will not be staring into space wondering where his sanity went.
  The walkway to the check-in counter accommodates only one party at a time. The staff and management feel that this is the best way to test your mettle for the rest of the stay. The narrow nightmare version of the Yellow Brick Road that leads to the desk is bordered on both sides by a variously changing collection of ponds that appear to be blood-filled wading pools. The color of the water varies from clot-black to diluted-cranberry red, as though drainage from some slaughter occurring in another part of the building is being washed past and then leaving. The varying blood flow is eternal.
   Once the arrangements are made at the desk the guest and his party are taken through the blinding white light that is like unto a curtain on the other side of which is the awe and mystery that is Hell.

The Lost Inspiration For The New Las Vegas

 

   The above statues have the honor and distinction of being the subconscious inspiration for my concept of the New Las Vegas. Originally standing at the two entrances of the RA nightclub at the Luxor, they have since been removed and lost as to their location. They were, I believe, created by a man named Daniel Miller. I had never stayed in Las Vegas until  in the recent past shortly before digital cameras became available. The woman I married had sublimated her avocation of photography to the mundane and - to me - the miserable existence of raising two sons amid a broken marriage. Since I was addicted to an appreciation of the visual arts, and being a writer, fully understanding the creative urge, I encouraged her to become again involved in her artistic pursuits.
Encouraging creativity in others is almost a vocation with me. She bought a camera and so did I although I knew nothing about photography or cameras but in short order I was immersed in study and practice. At the same time I became in a small way obsessed with seeing this phenomenon called Las Vegas in detail.
   We stayed a week at the Luxor and as I explored the hotel and the city, one morning, on my own I wandered the uninhabited portions of the casino and its environs and came upon the closed and, except for me, uninhabited environs of the entrance. These two sculptures stood guard. I gasped and said "Las Vegas is for me." I went and got my camera, a film device, and returned and took many pictures. No one stopped me. Flash attachments now at the Luxor are rewarded with fat-bellied idiots coming up to you and snarling at you to stop. How these dolts react these days to iphones taking pictures all over the place I don't know. However I was not bothered. Continuing my explorations I came across in an almost hidden portion of the huge arena a second entrance to the RA with two more statues, similar to these. I took pictures of them also, my cup now filled with delight and my cock now filled with jizz.
   After a few years we both upgraded to digital slr's. My first item of business after getting one was to return to the Luxor to really get down to business photographing these four women with all manner of mood-inducing creativity.
   The sculptures were gone. The RA had closed down forever and the guardians outside it were...well, who knows what happened to them. They certainly never reappeared at some other venue, not at the Luxor and not in the town itself.
   This ignited a simmering resentment that many years later resulted in this blog. I was determined to avenge these magnificent creatures, now lost to the world's slavering lust-chasers.
   Farewell, my pretties, I shall remake the entire city in your images or I shall die trying.

Follow me Please?

   This is the sight that guests will be seeing as they are escorted to their rooms. If some asshole at Walmart can escort you to the shelf of shitty shirts way on the other side of the filth they call a store then you can certainly be escorted to your room in the New Las Vegas. Only unlike at Walmart you will not be being led by a waddling mass of downwardly drooping wobbling lard that is all ass, back, thighs, and shoulders. No, you will be being led by a perfectly formed almost naked, net-covered goddess radiating energy to your swooning and God-praising cock. If the sight of these two asscheeks flexing and relaxing in front of you bothers your wife you need to either have a talk with her or have a talk with a divorce lawyer cause you are married to a fucking life-wasting mocker of all that is precious and wondrous and sanctified. You are married to a relative to swine and not to a species akin to humans. Fortunately at the New Las Vegas services are available that will render your idiot wife unconcious and obliviously safe in a cupboard or closet for the duration of your stay, some of which can be spent being
given a handjob by the woman who escorted you to your room, much to the indifference of your unconscious wife presently sleeping in the ancillary room of the spa where all the other unconscious wives are kept in a state of suspended everything while you and your semen-squirter enjoy all the comforts and delights of NLV.

May I Take Your Order Please?

   Get used to this sight. It's the one you will be seeing exclusively when your waitress addresses you. If you can't quite hear her when she talks due to her face being aimed at another table, just ask the guy across the way what she said once you get finished staring at her pussy. Having her have to repeat everything ten times should NOT be a problem if you are a normal heterosexual. If you are an abnormal homosexual, you might want to think about eating in Reno. Or Salt Lake City. Or someplace where naked pussy is not in your face all the time. And relax, don't worry about it, there are plenty of normal people waiting to take your place at the restaurant or bar.

The Fingerfuck Room

   In the New Las Vegas every hotel and casino and lounge and bar and saloon will have a Fingerfuck Room. Here girls and women of a nature so bashful they have never had an orgasm will sit on the leg of a gentle and expert Fingerfucker. The Fingerfucker will calmly and deliberately and with all the patience necessary gently caress the cameltoe slit between the legs of m'lady, allowing her if she likes to masturbate his naked cock as he does so. Payment for this service is at the discretion of the owner of the twat. This voluntary policy will encourage the Fingerfuckers to provide for their temporary and ever-changing wards an orgasm worth rewarding with cash.

No More Fucking Medieval Times

   You can kiss the Excalibur Hotel goodbye. If watching heavily clothed men hitting each other with metal pipes and metal chains and tossing handkerchiefs to equally overly-dressed fair maidens is your cup of tea, go to England and have your cup of tea with all the other faggots over there having cups of tea. In the New Las Vegas the dinner-time floorshows of gore and mayhem will feature and involve only scantily clad Amazons fighting other various classes of under-dressed women. They will fight near your table and sometimes fall dead at your feet with their flimsy rags tossed-up in disarray from their tits and asses and twats. It will be a dinnertime meal entertainment you will not soon forget and which your wife will keep reminding you about for the rest of your life. So don't bring her. Bring your daughter.

Getting Grampaw Laid

   The New Las Vegas will be going out of its way to see to it that old people get some action. And not just at the gaming tables. Why does grampaw have to sit all day at an electronic slot machine in his white peggars and gold lame' belt and shitty looking Sam Ax shirt when he could be fucking a 19 year old hot piece of ass. The scene depicted above will be multiplied in all quarters of the strip and city, theatrical-like tableaus wherein an emaciated crone or wizened old man will be having wet steaming sex with a fucking hottie. Porking nubiles will be seen as the norm by the visitors to the New Las Vegas. Human-thinking is easy to manipulate and easy to change if something is repeated often enough and if the impression is given that a new pool of peers exists here than exist in the visitor's normal environment. Peer pressure is everything to pathetic humans and if the peer pressure is that there is something wrong with you if you are 80 years old and you are NOT fucking a teen ager then there is something SERIOUSLY wrong with you....if that's the peer pressure then thinking can be altered immediately. Humans fear being out of step with the others in their vicinity. True leadership and individuality is rare on this planet among the species dedicated to needing weak and always-smiling "leadership." The New Las Vegas takes full advantage of this and will specialize in altering and upsetting the parameters of what is normally considered as normal.

The Only Sadnesses In The New Las Vegas

   Premature ejaculation among the denizens of hell and other planets is the only misfortune of a non-gambling one that will ever befall the guests of the New Las Vegas. Who can manage or monitor the gonads of an Imgulfug? Not Me! Who can say when a Reznaroq will cum? Only its own balls can do that. And thus the poor victimized lass who has paid good money to have her libido assuaged sits frustrated. What went wrong? Well, nothing. Spilled seed of the Interplanetaries and the Interdimensional is not a misstep here. It is merely a momentary event. Recharging of all the semen vats of all the denizens of delight in the New Las Vegas happen quickly. Try again! Do not blame your partner that you are so desireable that his cum cannot wait to reach you. Be complimented. You are irrestistable my dear!!

The Most Common Sign In The New Las Vegas

   What you see above is what you will see a lot in the New Las Vegas. Say goodbye to the do not disturb sign. There is only one reason hotel guests do not want to be disturbed anyway. Because they're fucking. Just hang the "we're fucking" sign and say hello to just a little bit of honesty.

The Amazon Hotel cont. - 4

   Amazons not only make life miserable for men they make life miserable for each other too. Hence, many of the entertainment tableaus and "shows" will be of half-dressed and not-dressed Amazon warriors slaughtering each other in mock warfare or else will consist of arenas of "dead" naked and partially naked bodies of the fallen and of the terribly wounded, laying about, slowly squirming in misery and exposing their most erotic of areas for you to stand and view. You will be a part of a history that never took place and you will be a part of it as a bystander and not as a participant, which is great when the history that you are a bystander to is a battlefield full of the dead and wounded, none of them with cocks and balls. Photography of course is encouraged. It might be a field of the dead but it is a most courteous one!

The Amazon Hotel cont. 3 - Die, male. Die

 
   Most men would consider a fuck from a beautiful Amazon warrior in exchange for having his throat slit 60 seconds after he orgasms to be a fair trade. And this bargaining folly is portrayed again and again throughout the decor and passageways of the Amazon Hotel and Casino. This is where women rule the roost, and anything not even resembling a roost, and anything that may not even know what a roost actually is. Sex and Death become not only a manifestation of a familiar theme in philosophy and literature they virtually become one word here. Be glad the blood you see spilled in here is not your own, insect male, because that tableau can easily be accommodated and made to happen. And quickly. So behave yourself, vermin. And do what you are told to do. And you will depart your stay under your own power rather than on a low-level rolling flatbed wagon destined for a temporary stop at the trash bin for the flatbed and a permanent stop there for you.

The Amazon Hotel cont. 2 - The Hall of Domination

   Pathetic male. Your silly penis with it's one-shot capacity. It is laughable. Our majestic vaginas can bring us in one session more pleasure than your silly-stick can bring you in a year. And yet you proclaim yourselves superior. Fool.
   In the Hall of Domination the ubiquitous Cirque du Soleil becomes the circus of pain. Men are treated the way they deserve to be treated and you get to watch. If you become uneasy at looking at the fate you truly deserve than you are free to move along but I suspect your lady friend will be amused. As she is amused by you and your insufferably insignificant little cock that could not satisfy a hamster much less a woman. You pathetic excuse for everything.

The Amazon Hotel cont. 1

   At the Amazon Hotel and Casino it's not all pain and suffering for the hapless male. Before he succumbs he at least gets an eyeful of tits and nipples to comfort him on his journey into insignificance and secondary status. The watchword here for men is accept whatever happens and do not attempt to change your destiny. If you are to have a destiny at all it will not be a decision that will be yours. If you behave your destiny will in the end be satisfactory. If you do not behave your destiny will not matter because you will have not have one. Worm.

The Amazon Warrior Hotel And Casino

   The New Las Vegas is not an exclusive domain of the conquerors of women. No. As the Amazon Warrior Hotel and Casino quickly makes manifest. The goddess of the realm where women rule greets the foolish male guest from her throne of forest murk and undergrowth dampness. Beasts of all kinds with ferocity as their salient feature hover near her. If she can command even these monsters then it will not be difficult commanding you. Bow down, you pathetic be-penised earthworm. And pray for the death that will not come.

Stage Shows

   This will be the New Las Vegas stage show as performed by the members of the New Cirque du Gonadus, or Circus of the Balls. It will be appearing nightly and daily on every stage and in many of the hotel hallways and arcadeways connecting venues. You don't have to buy tickets and there is no seating: you can walk right up to the performance as long as you don't physically interfere. If you do you will be rendered unconscious by human monitors and taken to the desert and left there to fend for yourself until you either miraculously rescue yourself or until you die.
   The performers will never sing, they will be too vocally occupied with either groaning or moaning or grunting. Choreography will be exclusively restricted to adroitly performed sexual acts, both natural and non, and music will be appropriate to the mood the artists wish to create via their performances.
   Reservations are not needed. Just walk up and watch. Photography is encouraged so that you can show all your friends back home what a wonderful place to be the New Las Vegas is.

Your Table Servers

   "Hi, guys; we're your table servers, Taylor and Brittany. We don't wear much clothing. We hope this will not be an inconvenience to you or anyone in your party. Are you ready to order?....or do you need a minute."
   This will be the normal state of affairs at all the restaurants in the New Las Vegas. Fuck the buffet, let's go where there's waitresses.
   There will be waiters in the gay restaurants. But not in the normal ones. You have a problem with that sir? May I suggest eating in Florida?

The Exterior Of The New Luxor Hotel And Casino

   The guests will be walking under the female-structure's legs to gain entrance to the New Luxor. There will be 20 such female structures along the entranceway. There will be 40 male structures identical to the two depicted here standing before each woman statue. No more rows of lamb's faces on dog's bodies at the New Luxor. If animals are involved at all it will be as Horus and Anubis, the raptor and jackal gods with human male bodies.  These statues will be up to 80 feet high. There will be no cutsey hinting-around at clandestine, naughty behavior in the New Las Vegas. No. The signs will be clear from every direction that you have just entered the land of the gonads and that you are here to fuck, take drugs, and gamble.

Jamming The Jam Dispenser

   Cunnilingus - or jamming the jam dispenser, as I call it -  is fine but cartoony depictions of it are usually much more dramatic and erotic to look at than actual photographs involving actual people. Hence, the New Las Vegas will be extravagant in its plethora of such scenes depicted in dining areas, where, you have to admit, such pictures are most appropriate. For is not pussy "eaten"? Yes, of course it is, at least in the vernacular. Doesn't the above cartoon make your mouth water? Of course it does! And since the waitress will not be serving pussy at this table, would you care for a menu? Maybe actual food will suffice. At least for now.

Thank You, Ma'am.

   Ng'narthlogog contemptuously and satedly abruptly leaves another satisfied and yet still-yearning customer, his artificial cock dripping its artificial semen as his costumed-self departs his deliriously orgasmed customer in one of the many other-worldly venues of sexual delights in the New Las Vegas. Customer satisfaction is job number one here, except at the gaming tables where customer satisfaction is still determined by the laws of probability and the odds always favor the house, and that must never change otherwise there would be no New Las Vegas.

The Necronomicon Hotel And Casino

   If I were to title the above concoction of cocks and balls and other things mixed in I would call it Testiculor. While there will be no shortage of Lovecraftian themes in the New Las Vegas, at least one playground of adult fun will be the Necronomicon Hotel where Lovecraft and HR Giger unite in a wedding long awaited and anticipated. This will not be a relaxing venue for most people, one has to already be in league or at least contact with the outre realms that surround all sentient populations, be they on this planet or on others, or be they not on planets at all but instead those places devoid of atoms and electrons, where only measurement occurs and where the rules bend and warp and lose shape altogether while still yet existing. Those who book into the Necronomicon are never refused when at some point they proclaim at the desk that they just cannot stay for their full reserved time. Money is always refunded with a smile, or at worst a quiet stare of disgust, or perhaps a look of relief that yet another of the Unworthy has learned that some places are not suited for the idiotic and the bland and the vapid, and that the Necronomicon Hotel is one of those places, and please inform your idiot friends that this is not a good place for them either. That is what will happen when you ask for a cancellation of your remaining stay. You will be accommodated; and given a roadmap to Reno or Laughlin or Primm or Stateline at absolutely no charge. Goodbye O Dull One. And take your fat wife and grandmother with you.

The Fingerfuck Lounge

   Sometimes a gal just needs a good fingerfuck rather than a whole body-on-body experience, especially if she is reluctant to kiss on a quickie-date due to the oftimes romantic attachments that can result, especially should she run up against an expert kissing master of love. The Fingerfuck Lounge - which all of the hotels in the New Las Vegas will have - allows your gal to be fingerfucked-only by a trained cast member of the Cirque du Soleil or similar troupe of carnies, and if her fantasy is to be fingerfucked by a nigger-colored Satan....what boyfriend would object? We only care if cocks are involved, and especially if there is no kissing no man would have a problem with his favorite gal having a fingerfuck session with a man in disguise. Is it really a nigger?....or is it just dark spray tan costuming from a can? Who can say? Who gives a shit? It can be Allah himself in all his faggottry magnificence and who will care? Not Brenda! She's paying good money for this experience. Stay out of it, boyfriend.

The High Satanic Majesty of Satan, Ruler of The New Las Vegas

   If you're going to call a town sin city and Satan is not the mascot and chief entertainment officer then you are not in sin city. You are in the old Las Vegas. And the old Las Vegas has no place in the New Las Vegas. Hence, get used to seeing Satan. And one thing Satan loves to do is fuck and get everyone else to fucking also.  Now Christians who do not understand Christianity might balk at seeing Satan so generally allowed the artistic and motiflic run of the place. But look at the plus side: it will keep all the Muslims back in New York and Minnesota where they belong. Sure the depictions of forcible rape by alien beings will attract them but the fact that one of the alien beings is cartoons of Satan will terrify them. Sure, cartoons of Satan terrify a lot of addle-headed Christians too but Christians are good at giving in to temptation so they'll get over it.

HR Giger Hotel And Casino cont. The Strange Room

   Is it gay? We don't know. Is it anti gay? We have no idea. Is it wrong? It sure looks that way. Is it out of place in the New Las Vegas? Not hardly. All we know is that it's the Strange Room of the HR Giger Hotel and Casino. As long as it does not involve actual death or injury to the customers of the New Las Vegas, if it's sexually oriented it's gonna be findable somewhere on the Strip or nearby to it. And if HR Giger is involved the sex might be weird but the sex will be there. One way or another. Maybe it will be in paralysis form where every one just stares in disbelief and don't actually do anything, but that's not an uncommon reaction when in HR's universe of mesmerizing disturbingness.

The H.R. Giger Hotel And Casino

   Things are different here. Sexual depictions are not only plentiful they are off-putting. And yet hypnotically stare-able. They cause you to lose yourself in a quiet fear that still does not make you run away. They nail you into place.
   You have to be able to find relaxation and comfortable escape in black nightmares in order to stay at the HR Giger Hotel. The decor is Contemporary Space Transport Cargo Bay with splashes of Hopeless 31st Century Desolation And Infestation. The walls are muraled with biomechanical shennanigans, some of them sexual some of them merely abominable.

The New Colossi

   Every hotel in the New Las Vegas will of course be themed and in every lobby and entrance way will be gigantic statues of unearthly and earthly denizens engaging in sexual congress with either their own species or with ours. They will loom over the guests in eternal dominational supremacy, reminding all present why they are there. Pompei will look like Legoland compared to the New Las Vegas.

The Peter Pan Bar At the Disney Hotel

   The Crocodile that tormented Capt. Hook has most of his desires satisfied in the Peter Pan Bar at the Hotel Disney in the New Las Vegas. Costumed employees formerly with the Cirque du Soleil entertain the patrons up close and for free and with a sexual abandon not dreamed of during their meaningless circus days flying around in the air to no purpose and performing meaningless acrobatic feats of skeletal complexity and bodily strength: why train all your life to do a back bend in ten dimensions while falling to your death when you can train on the job for 8 hours a day and write your own schedule by performing repeated sexual copulation moves upon a fellow employee while in a skinny costume that emphasizes nipple shape and cameltoe? Tinker Bell's piece-of-ass cousins entertain the Crocodile while making their tits and twats available to him and his hard red dick while the patrons watch or else round-up some action on their own. It's a small world after all, and one filled with tits, ass, pussy, cocks and balls!

Pirates Of The Caribbean New Las Vegas Style

   In the Pirates of the Caribbean Room of the Disney Hotel and Casino in the New Las Vegas, guests can, if they like, and have the money, be raped by pirates from another dimension. They carry machetes but they do not use them. They also carry large penises which they will be more than happy to use. Since these are not real aliens they are of course not real penises, merely dildos in the shape and in the location of penises. No husband or boyfriend can blame a girl if she is abducted and raped by omnidimensional pirates, now can they? Especially if they are allowed to watch and take pictures.

The New Snow White

   Behold Snow white, New Las Vegas Style.
   When the Disney Corp. finally succumbs to the pressure to either go-erotic or go out of existence,  it is going to go erotic. Eventually Disney-Lucas will be the only guiding artistic and entertainment lights in the New Las Vegas, and while it will seem like the end of the road for them to some, in reality it will be the beginning of both entities finally claiming their destinies.
   Above are 5 of the new dwarfs, Jizzy, Licky, Fingerfucky, Jackoffy and Kill. Naturally Kill has to be kept on a short leash by the other 6 dwarfs but it is still kind of interesting to know that he is always around and that he has been named Kill for a reason.
   In the New Las Vegas the parading Disney characters will not be Minnie and Mickey unless it is in their new zombie form. No, instead it will be the spate of Disney female heroines who will be manifesting themselves around the arenas of gawking fun, that mermaid bitch and that Jeanie In The Bottle half-breed semi exotic cunt and the Evil Queen will be in her pre-troll mode, with her Amazon physique and her full enlarged-pear mind-melting naked breasts, and I think you know how this is going to go.